Let’s talk about bad games for a moment.
As I’ve jokingly said in the past on this blog, PC gaming died somewhere around 2003-2004. I guess somewhere around the point Half-Life 2 was released. After the subliminal PC experience that was Half-Life, Valve realized that lighting had genuinely struck and that the odds were forever stacked against them. After all, it’s impossible for anyone to follow up the best single and multiplayer action games (for novelty’s sake we’re going to consider Counter-Strike part of Half-Life because it is) with another smash mega hit. So for six years Valve toiled and toiled to make the most polished game out on the market. No chaff was kept for their little darling as every individual piece was honed and crafted into a refined diamond that nobody could say with a straight face was “bad” in the traditional sense.
But that’s what Half-Life 2 is: a bad game.
It’s not the only game guilty of this sin, as we’re going to find out we can blame Halo and the rise of the modern gaming console as one of the many sinners that led us to this place, but it’s one of the three games I wanted to focus on talking about what the current standards of refinement and mass production have wrought in the gaming industry.
Compared to Half-Life, HL2 is a treat for the eyes, a fantastic soundscape, and a wonderful experience. None of these factors really matter though as story is ultimately irrelevant for a game. At this point, we come to a critical juncture in our industry where game is either about the gameplay or its story. Tragically, these separate pieces seem to have been impossible to recreate since Deus Ex in 2000.
For all the smoke and mirrors of a living world, HL2 ultimately made you into a mobile camera that relied on the stale gimmicks of boxy room after boxy room setpiece wherein a different gimmick separating you from the next door.
I can’t fully blame Valve though. Halo’s release in 2001 marked a permanent shift in the design of action games. Bungie stated themselves that goal of Halo was to make you enjoy “those first 30 seconds” of gameplay over and over again in every segment of combat. A noble goal considering those precious moment to moment experiences are what make up good games. Unfortunately, developers were too blindsided by the fact Bungie actually made an FPS work on the terribly controlling consoles that they completely missed the higher goals of the game design.
Instead of games with satisfying core mechanics built around a series of varying challenges to those mechanics, we instead game poorly scripted and paced movies with a series of base vaudeville vignettes of gameplay.
It shouldn’t be unsurprising, after all, considering the rise of console gaming within the sixth generation of systems. These are machines designed for quick and expendable single player games, as one must always be motivated to buy new carts to keep playing, and party oriented multiplayer games, as nobody wants to legitimately lose- heaven forbid.
Let’s look at a single player example- Bioshock.
Bioshock follows the Halo school of design to a T wherein the player will continue
to experience the first 30 seconds of gameplay every moment their in the game- because what they see in those first 30 seconds is the entire game.
Several of the more prominent members of the BS team were responsible for the absolutely stellar System Shock series and the granddaddy of all modern games Deus Ex. With such a pedigree behind them, the fact it’s a horrible game should come as a surprise.
What marks Bioshock as a critical failure- beyond its heavy handed story that rehashes System Shock 2 completely- is that it’s a no risk game.
If you die at any point your life will be completely regenerated. It’s not like such a regeneration should ever be necessary however, as you eventually become a jack of all trades in all weapons capable of regenerating your life constantly. Even then, all your weapons you acquire except for the wrench are rendered useless.
More damningly, I believe, is the revelation that your single free option in the game- to kill or not kill the kids- is essentially a wizard of oz style façade. You must always save the girls because that will net you the best tangible benefits. This is not an actual choice in essence, it is a linear target range with poor bump mapping and under rendered hallways powered by the Unreal Engine.
Remember, you certainly can limit yourself from all of this meta-knowledge to get into some bullshit thing like “the flavor of the game” but that’s a completely dismissable response. You are playing a game wherein the goal is to win. If that is the most effective path to victory, you will take it every time because it simply works.
System Shock 2 and Deus Ex, however, encourage a similar style of min/maxing that actually offers many different choices and actual consequences to your actions. Taking that new high powered rifle? You’ll need to make sure you’re actually trained in that skill. Take a new magic power but don’t like it any more? Too bad, so sad, it’s forever bound to your body and you’ve wasted a slot. In short, every decision you make has weight and the potential to forever screw up or benefit your experience.
On the multiplayer forefront, we have a game such as Call of Duty 6. Some will call it Modern Warfare 2 but they are liars, it is Call of Duty 6.
Here we have a shooter that takes its cues from Smash Brothers and Marvel Vs Capcom 2 wherein the guiding design principal is “throw enough crap in there and the game will automatically sort itself out”. Of course, I’m being unfair to MvC2 here, which is actually a very good game with an incredible level of potential skill on display. The SSB comparison is far more apt.
While Call of Duty 4 was actually incredibly well balanced across all platforms, which each system having its own different “power weapons” and such, CoD 6 is a game that discourages skillful playing. Rather than having players learn map routes and other tactics that have been standard fare since Counter-Strike was still relevant, CoD 6 believes you should remain seated at all times. Want to see folks coming? Attach a radar to your gun. Killed enough folks? Congratulations, you can automatically end the game.
For a pickup and play game, it’s fine for what it is. If anything the developers should be congratulated for making a game where anyone can win and where there is absolutely no viable cover other than the map boundaries.
However, such features do not make for a game of skill.
Unlike Quake 3, wherein a good player can survive indefinitely based on their skills alone, a good player in CoD 6 will eventually just be overrun or run out of ammo. With death more or less an “inevitability”, what’s the point? Why not just take your chances on a slot machine? It’d produce similar results in determining how often you won or lost.
On the opposite end of this multiplayer development spectrum is Quake 3, a game with incredibility limited options that produces a limitless skill cap. Any defeat you suffer in Quake is through your own horrible playing and not some sky god becoming bored with you. A shut out of 50-0 isn’t unheard of in Quake a good players will continue to dominate the playing field through a variety of skills most “semi-realistic” sorely lack (thus resulting in a whole generation of really subpar players but I digress).
This trend of bad games isn’t just limited to action games mind you, look at any RPG out on the market now. Compared to the glory days of rouge and nethack, games such as Mass Effect and Fallout 3 change your diaper for you as you play.
A game like nethack will take years for the average player to complete. Furthermore, every defeat they suffer will force them to replay the entire game over again. Unlike snoozes such as the Fable series, Oblivion, or any of the Zelda games from Ocaraina onwards, nethack can not and will not be completed by brute force attempts.
Sure with the typical Zelda you can just hold B and eventually Gannon will defeat himself, but attempting to fight flat footed in a typical hack session will result in you cleaning your entrails off someone else’s blade. That is assuming you don’t drink the “wrong” potion and accidentally kill yourself before the first enemy.
In short kids, games really are getting worse today in many ways. There are still diamonds in the rough, of course, but their numbers are dwindling. The defense of “it’s just fun” isn’t a good enough reason anymore. Sure, I can read a Harlequin romance or watch any one of the “Scary/Disaster/X” movies and said I “enjoyed them for what they were”, but those are all infantile justifications of either bad taste or guilty pleasures. If you want a more productive use of your gaming time, look for some classics and give yourself a real challenge.
Here, I’m such a nice guy I’m even offering links to two good games that will never age:
http://www.doomworld.com/classicdoom/info/shareware.php
http://www.nethack.org/
12/9/09
5/25/09
We can be bionic heroes, just for one day.
Goddamn has it been a long time. Sorry about that. Little thing called life tends to get in the way of whining about vidja games.
Anyways, the topic of today is the recently released Bionic Commando for the 360/PS3.
As with all of these posts, let me begin by telling you a story of a man I knew when I was young... wait scratch that, sounds a bit too familiar.
Anyways, most people will reminisce that their first memory of the BC series was on the NES with the titular first entry of the series. Archaic by today's discriminating taste (HOPE YOU ENJOY DYING IN ONE HIT PUNKASS), the game nevertheless managed to remain with gaming's collective memory for one simple reason.
It was the first game where you got to see Hitler's head explode.
While Wolfenstein 3d would eventually perfect the dictator murder simulation years later, Bionic Commando wormed its way into the hearts of 80s children everywhere for their first real taste of video game gore.
None of this matters to myself really, since my birthdate of 1987 was the year of the games release.
Instead, I would first gain an appreciation for the title years later with the Gameboy Color psudeo-sequel and series reboot entitled the same exact thing.
Using rotoscoped sprites, the title was a visual powerhouse for the little handheld at the time and presented a ball-stompingly difficult challenge that took me a good few months to play through.
Were I to play it now, thanks to the power of the internets ability to never forget, I'd probably clear it within the hour. My smug self assertiveness now aside, I was pretty terrible at games years ago.
Figuring the Gameboy title was a warmup for an upcoming N64 or Playstation game, I waited for a few months for any further news but was returned with only broken dreams and dead silence.
Since it was a handheld title, I left my memories of it to rot.
It wasn't until 2008 that I was reminded of that little game again when developer GRIN and publisher Capcom announced they were going to relaunch the Bionic Commando brand with a new current gen title and a bonus "mini" game through various download services.
Intrigued by the trailers, I watched with fascination about this new celebration of a well-loved friend returning home looked nothing like the girl I fell in love with. Essentially, Capcom collectively put their fingers in their ears over the existence over the GBC title and GRIN similarly responded with a collective shrug.
And thus, a new sequel to Bionic Commando was born entitled... Bionic Commando.
Keeping in mind the black sheep of the series, the GBC title, was also entitled the same. So basicly the Bionic Commando series has three games all called "Bionic Commando". At least Capcom has kept some consistency somewhere through the games.
The mini game released online, thankfully subtitled "Rearmed", was a reimaging of the NES game's 2d gameplay and applying, I dare to say again, our more modern and refined gaming sensibilities to the table.
It was a fair good appetite wheter that did add in some modern niceities such as a life bar and the ability to actually play it. Above all, I think, it did sell me on the idea of purple space men bringing back Hitler from the dead was a plot that actually matter and had some particality. Nevermind the fact it's never explained how Hitler can exist in a world so different from our own, especially considering his body was burned to a crisp after he shot himself, but SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP.
I was most impressed with the little title was the music. Reference both the NES and the GBC titles of the series into one modern day game which is at once a tribue to the era of bombastic 16 Bit consoles/DOS era games and incorporates all of the lessons in pacing and build up composers have learned since then.
Fitting then, that the current gen Bionic Commando plays the original theme we've heard across all these games in a melodic piano score with none of the digitized sounds we've heard from the days of yore beyond the fact it's original composure date is probably somewhere in the mid 80s.
Hearing the opening soundtrack is a fitting lead in to what Bionic Commando is: a eulogy to retro gaming.
Apparently, according to sources I don't care enough to cite, Bionic Commando's (which henceforth I'll call BC 3 for the sake of my sanity) production run was dropped from over 2 million units to just under several hundred thousand. While most would claim that it's a sign Capcom knew the game was bad, I beg to differ.
If anything, it shows their foresight after the Lost Planet debacle.
They know BC3 will be a niche product. After all, the plot is an incomprehensible mess unless you've played the Rearmed game, read an online comic series revealing the events prior to this game, and have read the manual before playing.
Most would say that such a poorly handled storyline should deduct imaginary review points, but I'll beg to differ.
It's, once again, a fitting eulogy to retro gaming.
Did we ever really know about Mario, Bowser, Sonic, and whatever other character was being marketed to us with neon colors and impact fonts? No, instead it was all infered through perhiphery media we consumed or, heaven forbid, read in the manual.
As Nathan RAD Spencer leaps from tall buildings with a single bound and questions the very nature of the human condition (one of these things is a blatant lie), we can't help but shake the feeling he's trapped within a 2D world and accutely aware of his dire situation.
All around him are blue clouds which, upon contact, instantly kill the player with nary a second through. Water forms an ever present and looming danger the likes of which haven't been seen since the early 90s. Death, perhaps most damningly, not only sends the player back several minutes in time but also undoes everything they'd done up to the point of croaking.
In short, it is a platformer with the camera shoved in the wrong location.
What's impressive is how the game handles all of the influences of the old with the requirements of the new. Case in point, the "collectibles".
Scattered throughout the game are little icons of NES Bionic Commando items that serve no purpose other than unlocking an concept art and achievements. Are they unnecessary? Completely. None of the character even reference them during their frequent motivation monologues. Instead, they're placed because GRIN knew you as a player couldn't avoid their siren song. They tap into the childlike fascination you once held with the older games.
They also hit upon your childhood frustrations of being required to turn off the console and go to dinner by having you loose all your trinkets everytime you bite the dust. There is no progress to be saved after all... you died, too bad, so sad.
Spencer, voiced by the jack-of-all-trades Mike Patton, also serves as a surrogate for the player in that post modern way we've come to expect from franchise reboots.
Sure, he performs all the motions becoming for an action hero, but his sarcastic smirks of self satsifaction every time he knocks a foot trooper into the abyss and his cries of "who's next" every time he kills a small platoon of soliders reflect that ever repressed id of the gamer currently holding the controller.
The game is challenging through the conventional means classic gaming, meaning lots of enemies and nary an item in sight, while never once assuming you're a moron at the game. Sure, game game has the obligatory "context senstitive" clues require of all modern gaming but I cannot but help but be impressed by the fact it never once bullshits you. Every time you die will be due to your own ineptitue with the controls. Every time you fight a boss, you will be required to learn their weak points. Most importantly, every time you fail you get a little bit better at the game.
Nathan's journey to redemption then, for you see he's a national traitor at the begining of the game but given pardon on the basis of being A BAD ENOUGH DUDE TO STOP THE TERRORISTS HELL YEAH, is the journey of the Bionic Commando franchise and the player's experience as a whole. It is a classically challenging game and elegant in all the right ways.
Long dormant, the player and Nathan must teeth their way back into the the habits of the old through an opening mission where they're castrated from their arm. Here, Nathan must learn to become a warrior in a strict game-only way. The player, however, must learn the basics of survival in a world that will not stop for them. Upon reuniting with the THE ARM, Nathan and the player are free. You may be guided by a disembodied voice from time to time, but for the majority of the game you and Nathan are entirely alone. Through this loneliness, then, comes your skill naturally as a player.
For those reasons, the title is bound to tank hard.
Going back to that main theme then, it's as though the composer knew this might just be the last time we'll ever see the Bionic Commando property and thus devised a theme which is at once heroic and sad. As you and Nathan triumph against all odds, victory will leave you with a sense of nihlistic complacement. You beat the game and Nathan arose to his rightful place as a bionic legend once more, yes, but that's also the end of him and the era of retro platformers.
His game hints at modern features which are bound supplant the classic ones in the next title, or patch even, therefore the end of BC3 also signifies the end of a franchise.
You could argue that the multiplayer mode would be the game's saving grace, but it too echoes a world of games that are no more. If anything, I'm reminded of Quakeworld with it where players are featureless characters bearing brightly colored suits of armor. Only the skilled prevailed while the scrubs are left to toil with a poor starting weapon and being as frail as a glass vase. It's fun, certainly, but not for the faint of heart.
Fitting then that the slow piano theme plays over the multiplayer menu.
In short, I'd check out the game if you feel up for a little challege and can put up with its endless load screens. In the end, you'll feel the same way as the David Bowie butchery I put as the subject line.
The game and you will champion the old ways gaming for a little while, but it's long past time for a burial. At least it's a viking send off.
Anyways, the topic of today is the recently released Bionic Commando for the 360/PS3.
As with all of these posts, let me begin by telling you a story of a man I knew when I was young... wait scratch that, sounds a bit too familiar.
Anyways, most people will reminisce that their first memory of the BC series was on the NES with the titular first entry of the series. Archaic by today's discriminating taste (HOPE YOU ENJOY DYING IN ONE HIT PUNKASS), the game nevertheless managed to remain with gaming's collective memory for one simple reason.
It was the first game where you got to see Hitler's head explode.
While Wolfenstein 3d would eventually perfect the dictator murder simulation years later, Bionic Commando wormed its way into the hearts of 80s children everywhere for their first real taste of video game gore.
None of this matters to myself really, since my birthdate of 1987 was the year of the games release.
Instead, I would first gain an appreciation for the title years later with the Gameboy Color psudeo-sequel and series reboot entitled the same exact thing.
Using rotoscoped sprites, the title was a visual powerhouse for the little handheld at the time and presented a ball-stompingly difficult challenge that took me a good few months to play through.
Were I to play it now, thanks to the power of the internets ability to never forget, I'd probably clear it within the hour. My smug self assertiveness now aside, I was pretty terrible at games years ago.
Figuring the Gameboy title was a warmup for an upcoming N64 or Playstation game, I waited for a few months for any further news but was returned with only broken dreams and dead silence.
Since it was a handheld title, I left my memories of it to rot.
It wasn't until 2008 that I was reminded of that little game again when developer GRIN and publisher Capcom announced they were going to relaunch the Bionic Commando brand with a new current gen title and a bonus "mini" game through various download services.
Intrigued by the trailers, I watched with fascination about this new celebration of a well-loved friend returning home looked nothing like the girl I fell in love with. Essentially, Capcom collectively put their fingers in their ears over the existence over the GBC title and GRIN similarly responded with a collective shrug.
And thus, a new sequel to Bionic Commando was born entitled... Bionic Commando.
Keeping in mind the black sheep of the series, the GBC title, was also entitled the same. So basicly the Bionic Commando series has three games all called "Bionic Commando". At least Capcom has kept some consistency somewhere through the games.
The mini game released online, thankfully subtitled "Rearmed", was a reimaging of the NES game's 2d gameplay and applying, I dare to say again, our more modern and refined gaming sensibilities to the table.
It was a fair good appetite wheter that did add in some modern niceities such as a life bar and the ability to actually play it. Above all, I think, it did sell me on the idea of purple space men bringing back Hitler from the dead was a plot that actually matter and had some particality. Nevermind the fact it's never explained how Hitler can exist in a world so different from our own, especially considering his body was burned to a crisp after he shot himself, but SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP.
I was most impressed with the little title was the music. Reference both the NES and the GBC titles of the series into one modern day game which is at once a tribue to the era of bombastic 16 Bit consoles/DOS era games and incorporates all of the lessons in pacing and build up composers have learned since then.
Fitting then, that the current gen Bionic Commando plays the original theme we've heard across all these games in a melodic piano score with none of the digitized sounds we've heard from the days of yore beyond the fact it's original composure date is probably somewhere in the mid 80s.
Hearing the opening soundtrack is a fitting lead in to what Bionic Commando is: a eulogy to retro gaming.
Apparently, according to sources I don't care enough to cite, Bionic Commando's (which henceforth I'll call BC 3 for the sake of my sanity) production run was dropped from over 2 million units to just under several hundred thousand. While most would claim that it's a sign Capcom knew the game was bad, I beg to differ.
If anything, it shows their foresight after the Lost Planet debacle.
They know BC3 will be a niche product. After all, the plot is an incomprehensible mess unless you've played the Rearmed game, read an online comic series revealing the events prior to this game, and have read the manual before playing.
Most would say that such a poorly handled storyline should deduct imaginary review points, but I'll beg to differ.
It's, once again, a fitting eulogy to retro gaming.
Did we ever really know about Mario, Bowser, Sonic, and whatever other character was being marketed to us with neon colors and impact fonts? No, instead it was all infered through perhiphery media we consumed or, heaven forbid, read in the manual.
As Nathan RAD Spencer leaps from tall buildings with a single bound and questions the very nature of the human condition (one of these things is a blatant lie), we can't help but shake the feeling he's trapped within a 2D world and accutely aware of his dire situation.
All around him are blue clouds which, upon contact, instantly kill the player with nary a second through. Water forms an ever present and looming danger the likes of which haven't been seen since the early 90s. Death, perhaps most damningly, not only sends the player back several minutes in time but also undoes everything they'd done up to the point of croaking.
In short, it is a platformer with the camera shoved in the wrong location.
What's impressive is how the game handles all of the influences of the old with the requirements of the new. Case in point, the "collectibles".
Scattered throughout the game are little icons of NES Bionic Commando items that serve no purpose other than unlocking an concept art and achievements. Are they unnecessary? Completely. None of the character even reference them during their frequent motivation monologues. Instead, they're placed because GRIN knew you as a player couldn't avoid their siren song. They tap into the childlike fascination you once held with the older games.
They also hit upon your childhood frustrations of being required to turn off the console and go to dinner by having you loose all your trinkets everytime you bite the dust. There is no progress to be saved after all... you died, too bad, so sad.
Spencer, voiced by the jack-of-all-trades Mike Patton, also serves as a surrogate for the player in that post modern way we've come to expect from franchise reboots.
Sure, he performs all the motions becoming for an action hero, but his sarcastic smirks of self satsifaction every time he knocks a foot trooper into the abyss and his cries of "who's next" every time he kills a small platoon of soliders reflect that ever repressed id of the gamer currently holding the controller.
The game is challenging through the conventional means classic gaming, meaning lots of enemies and nary an item in sight, while never once assuming you're a moron at the game. Sure, game game has the obligatory "context senstitive" clues require of all modern gaming but I cannot but help but be impressed by the fact it never once bullshits you. Every time you die will be due to your own ineptitue with the controls. Every time you fight a boss, you will be required to learn their weak points. Most importantly, every time you fail you get a little bit better at the game.
Nathan's journey to redemption then, for you see he's a national traitor at the begining of the game but given pardon on the basis of being A BAD ENOUGH DUDE TO STOP THE TERRORISTS HELL YEAH, is the journey of the Bionic Commando franchise and the player's experience as a whole. It is a classically challenging game and elegant in all the right ways.
Long dormant, the player and Nathan must teeth their way back into the the habits of the old through an opening mission where they're castrated from their arm. Here, Nathan must learn to become a warrior in a strict game-only way. The player, however, must learn the basics of survival in a world that will not stop for them. Upon reuniting with the THE ARM, Nathan and the player are free. You may be guided by a disembodied voice from time to time, but for the majority of the game you and Nathan are entirely alone. Through this loneliness, then, comes your skill naturally as a player.
For those reasons, the title is bound to tank hard.
Going back to that main theme then, it's as though the composer knew this might just be the last time we'll ever see the Bionic Commando property and thus devised a theme which is at once heroic and sad. As you and Nathan triumph against all odds, victory will leave you with a sense of nihlistic complacement. You beat the game and Nathan arose to his rightful place as a bionic legend once more, yes, but that's also the end of him and the era of retro platformers.
His game hints at modern features which are bound supplant the classic ones in the next title, or patch even, therefore the end of BC3 also signifies the end of a franchise.
You could argue that the multiplayer mode would be the game's saving grace, but it too echoes a world of games that are no more. If anything, I'm reminded of Quakeworld with it where players are featureless characters bearing brightly colored suits of armor. Only the skilled prevailed while the scrubs are left to toil with a poor starting weapon and being as frail as a glass vase. It's fun, certainly, but not for the faint of heart.
Fitting then that the slow piano theme plays over the multiplayer menu.
In short, I'd check out the game if you feel up for a little challege and can put up with its endless load screens. In the end, you'll feel the same way as the David Bowie butchery I put as the subject line.
The game and you will champion the old ways gaming for a little while, but it's long past time for a burial. At least it's a viking send off.
4/17/09
I'm just angry cause a preteen teabagged me
Anyone who listens to me talk for a while knows that I'm interested in competitive gaming. This doesn't mean I'm good at games, but that I find the whole idea of competitive games fascinating.
Obviously, like everything else you've read here, my primary interest lies in competitive FPS games. But don't get me wrong, fighting and RTS games- the other two massive draws- have their own benefits and disadvantages. If you sat me down and told me to pick the genre of perfect skill, it'd be fighting games, but that's besides the point of my discussion for now.
Anyways, when it comes to competitive FPS games, one of the main problems with the whole genre is that no one can find a definitive game that incorporates all aspects of competitive play. Fans of team games have plenty of support of their titles such as Halo 3, Counter-Strike, and Call of Duty 4 while Twitch/Duel fans have the old standbys of Quake 3, Painkiller, and CPMA- though twitch games are going the way of the dodo right now.
So the question I ask every, how do we make a game that appeals to these diverse groups of people? Obviously this is impossible, so the next challenge would be to make one appeal to one group or the other. The tragic part of super competitive games are that what you see on the box are rarely what the game actually plays like.
Case in point, here's what Quake 3 should look like.
But, here's what many high level players see.
Suffice to say, it's a striking difference.
Console titles don't really suffer from this problem, as they're locked machines.
So, when making this ultimate game it's clear that a designer would need to focus on one platform or the other mainly in terms of thinking of how their ascetic will look.
Anyways, moving on to actual gameplay I'd argue for twitch midrange encounters that reward preparation. In short, the Quake model. Modern team based games rarely encourage map knowledge, while dueling based games require a certain intimacy with levels I feel is missing nowadays.
The main crux I want to get to is this, people will buy competitive games and watch them so long as they're pleasing to view. With Quake, the spaztastic nature of the game means many don't know what's going on unless they know how the game operate on an intimate level. Halo 3, on the other hand, can be picked up from casually watching. Of course, Halo has more than it's share of problems at the competitive level, but such is life.
Obviously, like everything else you've read here, my primary interest lies in competitive FPS games. But don't get me wrong, fighting and RTS games- the other two massive draws- have their own benefits and disadvantages. If you sat me down and told me to pick the genre of perfect skill, it'd be fighting games, but that's besides the point of my discussion for now.
Anyways, when it comes to competitive FPS games, one of the main problems with the whole genre is that no one can find a definitive game that incorporates all aspects of competitive play. Fans of team games have plenty of support of their titles such as Halo 3, Counter-Strike, and Call of Duty 4 while Twitch/Duel fans have the old standbys of Quake 3, Painkiller, and CPMA- though twitch games are going the way of the dodo right now.
So the question I ask every, how do we make a game that appeals to these diverse groups of people? Obviously this is impossible, so the next challenge would be to make one appeal to one group or the other. The tragic part of super competitive games are that what you see on the box are rarely what the game actually plays like.
Case in point, here's what Quake 3 should look like.
But, here's what many high level players see.
Suffice to say, it's a striking difference.
Console titles don't really suffer from this problem, as they're locked machines.
So, when making this ultimate game it's clear that a designer would need to focus on one platform or the other mainly in terms of thinking of how their ascetic will look.
Anyways, moving on to actual gameplay I'd argue for twitch midrange encounters that reward preparation. In short, the Quake model. Modern team based games rarely encourage map knowledge, while dueling based games require a certain intimacy with levels I feel is missing nowadays.
The main crux I want to get to is this, people will buy competitive games and watch them so long as they're pleasing to view. With Quake, the spaztastic nature of the game means many don't know what's going on unless they know how the game operate on an intimate level. Halo 3, on the other hand, can be picked up from casually watching. Of course, Halo has more than it's share of problems at the competitive level, but such is life.
3/13/09
Resident Malcom X
A GAME WITH SO MUCH TO SAY, IT'S GOING TO TAKE 2 PARTS!
Actually, in terms of what the game's really trying to communicate, there isn't much to say beyond "hey, hey, SHOOT EVERYTHING". What is of note, however, is the setting of Africa.
Accusations have been flung that the game is depicts largely uncomfortable images to the American public on the basis of the game being set in a "not-Africa" country.
I'm here to assert those accusations are entirely correct.
Were I to keep it brief, I could point to the fact that most of the monsters you shoot have been changed from outright dark skinned Somalians to a mix of Iranians and Quasi-Asian characters. Sure you still get the occasional jet black character, but for the most part your opposition has been bleached. Capcom was attempting to avoid something, there's obviously some basis to this argument.
Being that our game buying and playing public has never heard of PC games before (as they are dead you see, the tombstone reads somewhere around 2004), nobody remembers the game Delta Force Black Hawk Down. Based on the movie/operation of the same name, you played as Sgt. Joe Shmoe as he goes in to kill everyone in Africa in his quest to bring one single really evil African (you know so as he wears glasses, the heathen) to justice... lead justice. The game was fun and very much ahead of it's time, jingoistic worldview aside, as it played like a combination of Medal of Honor and Call of Duty 4 before such a game existed.
As you meandered about the African countryside killing rebels- I assume, as your only motivation to kill everyone is that the government dictates so- you'd inevitably end up blasting your way through countless shantytowns and villages. What's surprising, however, is that the game faithfully rendered women and children in these villages as well. Not only would they run away from you, they'd even insult and chuck rocks at you.
Fitting then, that your only interaction with them was violence. Not only could you shoot them, they could be killed without mercy or penalty.
Why am I talking about this game within the context of RE5? Well, both have a section where you need to dodge alligators so my digression isn't completely lost. Above that, however, is that RE5 lets you perform the same actions and actively encourages you to slaughter that ever present "other".
Let's take a typical boneheads defensive post about the game FROM THE INTERNET. It's scary I know, don't worry, I'll hold you. These are all from the same fellow and his responses to another person who thinks like myself:
-------------------------------------------------------------
Blah blah blah his boring point goes on and on. Now, before we discuss how he's a hood short of attending a Klan rally, let's debunk the counter arguement many players will have: Resident Evil 4.
RE4 had you visit, as the sexy white man you were, a completely fictionalized version of Spain where peasant farmers still exist. Obviously the were infected with the monster virus and you need to kill everyone. One person on the web even put forward a very interesting argument that you were taking part in the Spanish Inquisition as all the bosses/royalty characters lived in luxury with exotic torture chambers while the pesants toiled the fields. I'm not one to argue with that assesment. The fact you explore villages, castles, dungeons, and caves only supports it further.
Thing is, however, every monster you fight genuinely looks like something inhuman. Case in point:
http://www.gamethink.net/IMG/jpg/re4_ps2_2005_villagers_attacking.jpg
They speak pig-latin Spanish, sure, but from that blurry image you can see they're set up completely inhuman.
Now, let's look at RE5:
http://theblacksentinel.files.wordpress.com/2007/08/resident-evil-5-20070726113937477.jpg
A bit more realistic but, hey, it is Africa. I can dig it...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cj7pOOFcK5w&feature=related
Skip to around the 50 second mark, notice how they try to dodge a bullet by making the "kidnapper" character paler.
Nice try Capcom, you're not fooling anyone.
See this wouldn't be a big deal if the blonde girl was an established character. Problem is, what you see here is all that you see of that girl. She is set up to merely scream, be raped, and then quickly killed off. Why was she necessary? In Resident Evil 4 you could argue that Ashley provided a similar role, but her purpose was a game mechanic as well. You had to protect her lest you wanted your game to end. Here, we see a white, blonde woman in the middle of a quarintined African warzone. There is absolutely no justification, plotwise, why she should be here.
If you wanted my take on it though, which you're going to get since you're reading this, it's to play on white boy fears.
Now, another good counterpoint would be the recent Far Cry 2 game. You play a whitey in that, why is that suddenly ok?
Simple, all the enemies are as well armed as you are. In RE5, they're lucky to find enough pots and pans to toss at you. You could also argue that in FC2, Africans are being forced to kill one another and you by other Africans. RE5, on the other hand, very plainly sets up a collection of white villians manipulating the lives of Africans.
We also can't forget that the African female lead has a collection of Alternative outfits, once of which is her naked barring a rag and warpaint. Meanwhile the white male gets a whole safari outfit.
I could also point out the fact that one of the bonus multiplayer modes has you killing the infected Africans with a partner, trying to score more kills than the pairs in the level. Keep in mind, of course, that the female lead is the only other African character you can play as.
Speaking from a gameplay angle, it's fine and a fun concept. Video games are different from a boardgame or math equation though due to that external layer of graphics and sound however. Taking those rules within the context of setting, well...
They also resort to spear chucking enemies, can't forget that.
Of course, my concern about such things is because I'm entirely a racist of course. Yes, indeed.
Anyways, review of the actual gameplay is forthcoming. If you want a bite sized snipped you can take this to heard: A fun game exists beneath all the tangental bullshit mechanics they ruin it with.
Imagine having to play a Left 4 Dead map for 15 hours. Now imagine you had to do it with only 2 people and one of them was a bot. Now imagine if you and this bot had to share ammo.
Edit: Just have to add part of this other internet writing on the game. It's about the spear tossing zombies. Italics mine.
"I didn't think the game was racist at all. It's just based in a different country. The people who are all dressed like ancient tribal africans are just meant to have gone mental and reverted to some primal instincts or something, there was a diary about it in the game somewhere. Other than that, what the fuck is meant to be racist in the game?"
So wait... ancient Africans operated on primal instincts alone... oh dear.
Actually, in terms of what the game's really trying to communicate, there isn't much to say beyond "hey, hey, SHOOT EVERYTHING". What is of note, however, is the setting of Africa.
Accusations have been flung that the game is depicts largely uncomfortable images to the American public on the basis of the game being set in a "not-Africa" country.
I'm here to assert those accusations are entirely correct.
Were I to keep it brief, I could point to the fact that most of the monsters you shoot have been changed from outright dark skinned Somalians to a mix of Iranians and Quasi-Asian characters. Sure you still get the occasional jet black character, but for the most part your opposition has been bleached. Capcom was attempting to avoid something, there's obviously some basis to this argument.
Being that our game buying and playing public has never heard of PC games before (as they are dead you see, the tombstone reads somewhere around 2004), nobody remembers the game Delta Force Black Hawk Down. Based on the movie/operation of the same name, you played as Sgt. Joe Shmoe as he goes in to kill everyone in Africa in his quest to bring one single really evil African (you know so as he wears glasses, the heathen) to justice... lead justice. The game was fun and very much ahead of it's time, jingoistic worldview aside, as it played like a combination of Medal of Honor and Call of Duty 4 before such a game existed.
As you meandered about the African countryside killing rebels- I assume, as your only motivation to kill everyone is that the government dictates so- you'd inevitably end up blasting your way through countless shantytowns and villages. What's surprising, however, is that the game faithfully rendered women and children in these villages as well. Not only would they run away from you, they'd even insult and chuck rocks at you.
Fitting then, that your only interaction with them was violence. Not only could you shoot them, they could be killed without mercy or penalty.
Why am I talking about this game within the context of RE5? Well, both have a section where you need to dodge alligators so my digression isn't completely lost. Above that, however, is that RE5 lets you perform the same actions and actively encourages you to slaughter that ever present "other".
Let's take a typical boneheads defensive post about the game FROM THE INTERNET. It's scary I know, don't worry, I'll hold you. These are all from the same fellow and his responses to another person who thinks like myself:
-------------------------------------------------------------
To be honest, I don't care. You know why? You are always gonna offend someone, if you mean to or not.
I really don't think painting attrocities happening in a war torn african country is that hurtful, seeing as, you know, a lot of attrocities actually DO happen in africa, so it's not exactly an unrealistic liberty they are taking to show attrocities in a civil war torn land.
Uh.....what?
I've seen footage of africans beating their own people before, and of all sorts of violence...
Yes images of black people being violent were used as racist propaganda back in the day, but just because something depicts black violence does NOT mean it is evoking that spirit.
Maybe it tells you something about the people who draw the parelles between racist artwork and this, than the people who just see it as a violent scene without noticing race?
It's interesting how the ones shouting racism seemed to notice the race of the violent people, whereas most took it what it was: a violent scene in a war torn country. I know which of those two groups sounds like the real racists to me.
--------------------------------------------------------------------Blah blah blah his boring point goes on and on. Now, before we discuss how he's a hood short of attending a Klan rally, let's debunk the counter arguement many players will have: Resident Evil 4.
RE4 had you visit, as the sexy white man you were, a completely fictionalized version of Spain where peasant farmers still exist. Obviously the were infected with the monster virus and you need to kill everyone. One person on the web even put forward a very interesting argument that you were taking part in the Spanish Inquisition as all the bosses/royalty characters lived in luxury with exotic torture chambers while the pesants toiled the fields. I'm not one to argue with that assesment. The fact you explore villages, castles, dungeons, and caves only supports it further.
Thing is, however, every monster you fight genuinely looks like something inhuman. Case in point:
http://www.gamethink.net/IMG/jpg/re4_ps2_2005_villagers_attacking.jpg
They speak pig-latin Spanish, sure, but from that blurry image you can see they're set up completely inhuman.
Now, let's look at RE5:
http://theblacksentinel.files.wordpress.com/2007/08/resident-evil-5-20070726113937477.jpg
A bit more realistic but, hey, it is Africa. I can dig it...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cj7pOOFcK5w&feature=related
Skip to around the 50 second mark, notice how they try to dodge a bullet by making the "kidnapper" character paler.
Nice try Capcom, you're not fooling anyone.
See this wouldn't be a big deal if the blonde girl was an established character. Problem is, what you see here is all that you see of that girl. She is set up to merely scream, be raped, and then quickly killed off. Why was she necessary? In Resident Evil 4 you could argue that Ashley provided a similar role, but her purpose was a game mechanic as well. You had to protect her lest you wanted your game to end. Here, we see a white, blonde woman in the middle of a quarintined African warzone. There is absolutely no justification, plotwise, why she should be here.
If you wanted my take on it though, which you're going to get since you're reading this, it's to play on white boy fears.
Now, another good counterpoint would be the recent Far Cry 2 game. You play a whitey in that, why is that suddenly ok?
Simple, all the enemies are as well armed as you are. In RE5, they're lucky to find enough pots and pans to toss at you. You could also argue that in FC2, Africans are being forced to kill one another and you by other Africans. RE5, on the other hand, very plainly sets up a collection of white villians manipulating the lives of Africans.
We also can't forget that the African female lead has a collection of Alternative outfits, once of which is her naked barring a rag and warpaint. Meanwhile the white male gets a whole safari outfit.
I could also point out the fact that one of the bonus multiplayer modes has you killing the infected Africans with a partner, trying to score more kills than the pairs in the level. Keep in mind, of course, that the female lead is the only other African character you can play as.
Speaking from a gameplay angle, it's fine and a fun concept. Video games are different from a boardgame or math equation though due to that external layer of graphics and sound however. Taking those rules within the context of setting, well...
They also resort to spear chucking enemies, can't forget that.
Of course, my concern about such things is because I'm entirely a racist of course. Yes, indeed.
Anyways, review of the actual gameplay is forthcoming. If you want a bite sized snipped you can take this to heard: A fun game exists beneath all the tangental bullshit mechanics they ruin it with.
Imagine having to play a Left 4 Dead map for 15 hours. Now imagine you had to do it with only 2 people and one of them was a bot. Now imagine if you and this bot had to share ammo.
Edit: Just have to add part of this other internet writing on the game. It's about the spear tossing zombies. Italics mine.
"I didn't think the game was racist at all. It's just based in a different country. The people who are all dressed like ancient tribal africans are just meant to have gone mental and reverted to some primal instincts or something, there was a diary about it in the game somewhere. Other than that, what the fuck is meant to be racist in the game?"
So wait... ancient Africans operated on primal instincts alone... oh dear.
3/12/09
Musing
Last weekend I picked up two titles on a whim, Tony Hawk's Underground and Eat Lead: The Return of Matt Hazard.
THUG (hur hur hur) needs no introduction really since it's such an old game, but I'll get to it in a moment. Instead I want this post to focus on Matt Hazard.
Matt Hazard symbolizes why nerd humor isn't funny. It's akin to lolcats. Sure, a joke is funny when it's mentioned. It's not funny when you say the joke, the go into exacting detail about why that joke isn't funny.
Matt Hazard is guilty of the latter throughout most of the game. On paper, the concept of parody every action game within the last 25 years is wonderful. It's not like there's a shortage of material to work with there. What's inexcusable though, is taking those cliches and making use of them anyways.
Case in point: In the second level of the game you have to protect a buddy by sniping at enemies which come from all angles to attack him. To do so, you command a Slient Scope arcade machine. Funny, but it doesn't change the fact you're still forced to play an insufferable escort segment.
I think above all, as whiny as it sounds, you just die too fast. This is a comedy game, I don't want to have to actually try. I'd perfer a Monkey Island style route where there's no real failure.
In short don't be a sap like me and pay a full 50 bones for it. Around 20 bucks or a rental I'd say snap it up.
As for Tony Hawk, I had to rebuy it since it was the only sport game I ever owned on the PS2. I never really enjoyed any of the other Hawk titles, but for some reason this title clicked with me. Replaying it is a rude awakening in how much I suck, but eh.
Tomorrow Resident Evil 5 comes out. I look forward to killing minorities in a jungle/desert setting once again. It is something I haven't done since Crysis, Far Cry 2, Call of Duty 4, and probably a dozen other games that were all released in the past 6 months.
If you're wondering why the above reviews were short, there's not really much to say about the games. RE5 will provide some decent fodder soon enough. Till then, tootles.
THUG (hur hur hur) needs no introduction really since it's such an old game, but I'll get to it in a moment. Instead I want this post to focus on Matt Hazard.
Matt Hazard symbolizes why nerd humor isn't funny. It's akin to lolcats. Sure, a joke is funny when it's mentioned. It's not funny when you say the joke, the go into exacting detail about why that joke isn't funny.
Matt Hazard is guilty of the latter throughout most of the game. On paper, the concept of parody every action game within the last 25 years is wonderful. It's not like there's a shortage of material to work with there. What's inexcusable though, is taking those cliches and making use of them anyways.
Case in point: In the second level of the game you have to protect a buddy by sniping at enemies which come from all angles to attack him. To do so, you command a Slient Scope arcade machine. Funny, but it doesn't change the fact you're still forced to play an insufferable escort segment.
I think above all, as whiny as it sounds, you just die too fast. This is a comedy game, I don't want to have to actually try. I'd perfer a Monkey Island style route where there's no real failure.
In short don't be a sap like me and pay a full 50 bones for it. Around 20 bucks or a rental I'd say snap it up.
As for Tony Hawk, I had to rebuy it since it was the only sport game I ever owned on the PS2. I never really enjoyed any of the other Hawk titles, but for some reason this title clicked with me. Replaying it is a rude awakening in how much I suck, but eh.
Tomorrow Resident Evil 5 comes out. I look forward to killing minorities in a jungle/desert setting once again. It is something I haven't done since Crysis, Far Cry 2, Call of Duty 4, and probably a dozen other games that were all released in the past 6 months.
If you're wondering why the above reviews were short, there's not really much to say about the games. RE5 will provide some decent fodder soon enough. Till then, tootles.
3/4/09
FEAR 2:Electric Boogaloo
Monolith Software must have employed Bertha Rochester during the more formative years of the company, it's the only way to explain their track record.
For every excellent concept they develop, they somehow manage to screw up several other bad ideas in the process.
Two of their early titles, Blood and Shogo: Mobile Armor Division were excellent titles and solid concepts. The only drawback was that in both games most players wouldn't live long enough to see the actual game as your character was more frail than an anemic child.
Then came their problem with sequels... they are universally terrible in comparison to the first game 90% of the time. Ok, I'll grant you Aliens vs Predator 2 and maybe No One Lives Forever 2.
FEAR 2 breaks that curse... kind of. Perhaps a little bit of history is in order, both of myself and the game.
Back in 2004 I had first heard of Monolith's next titles, one for that new fangled Xbox 360 coming out the follow fall with the other being a PC only title through and through. I found out the console one was about beating up the homeless while the PC title would be a cross between the X-Files, John Woo, and Rainbow Six.
As any punk kid with a new Alienware would do, I bet on FEAR being the megahit.
So thus the waiting game began, but the game of life took greater precidence. Notably, I went off to college like adultescent boy my age and fell into the rut of excessive boozing and studying.
Put blunt, life was damn good.
Near the end of my first month, I remembered that both FEAR and Quake 4 were to be released and thus immediately picked up my copies.
Now, it's important to note that I purchased my copies at the Leominster Circuity City. At the time, it was the only electronics store within a 30 mile radius of my college outside of Gamestop. Though the prices would fluxuate wildly, I ended up making that store my third most visited location in the glorious Fitchburg/Leominster area, behind the liquor store and Tiki Tiki- the best Chinese takeout in Fitchburg fyi.
Eagerly rushing back to my dorm to install all 5 cds of FEAR, I came to a horrific realization within two hours.
It sucked.
It wasn't a straight up suck that just has the marks of a bad game written all over it, but it was a special kind of suck where every good idea an intention they may have had with the finished product resulted in a disaster.
In short, it was pretty analogus to the Leominster Circuit City.
Now, four years have passed and everything has been turned on its head since then. My PC continues to age and languish while I buy dongle after dongle for my 360, I found to my pleasure that Condemned's hobo murdering was game of the year material, and I've since been forced off campus due to my aforementioned lifestyle.
More importantly though, Circuit City will probably be nothing but an abandoned storefront by the time you read this.
Fitting then, that Monolith finally brings its A-Game to the table when I'm at a point in my life that it means so very little.
Anyways on to the game itself. FEAR 2 is a retooling of FEAR 1. Monolith discovered the hard way no one cares about PC games anymore, therefore the entire game is nothing but a retelling of the first game.
It's also in this retelling they loose a wondeful plot to the throes of stupid designs. Goddamned Bertha.
Watch out, I'm going to spoil the game for you and not care so stop here I guess if you want to play this and not have the ending ruined. In all honesty though, you can enjoy the game more if you know the disappointment that follows.
FEAR 2 ends with your protagonist being raped by the ghost of the 14 year old clone of the Ring girl.
Yes, that is the ending. It is as stupid and as contrived as one can get in a first person shooter. It resolves no plot, provides no closure, it just simply ends with your character feeling his seed in the belly of Alma.
Were the writers and designers of Monolith actually intelligent, it could have made for a great play upon the suburban nightmare of teen pregnancy. Moreover, they could have explored very real prejudices and "fears" within their target audience. After all, for the 15-25 year old male, nothing is more terrifying than the idea of unwittingly becoming a father.
Interestingly, and perhaps a sign of silent protest against Bertha, levels are designed around the concepts of areas in which teens meet and fuck. It's quiet ingenious in all honesty. Of course, there are the science labs, test areas, and all the other shlock that comes with the territory of a sci-fi shooter, but brief moments of insight shine through.
For instance, at one point in the game you're forced to explore a school. Simple, straight forward, and insipid once you realize it's an underground testing site!!!!!! (Those exclamations are to represent your shock you see)
Nevertheless, the crux of the spooky sequence in the level take place in the dimly lit broom closets of the school. Wearing nothing but her hair, Alma meanders the coridors always two steps ahead of you, seemly luring you to follow her. When you do eventually catch up to her, which occurs only at her discression, you're momentarily pinned up against a locker while she seems to smile while inspecting your body.
Later in the game, as you meander through the city streets shooting spacemen or the storm troopers or whatever they are, you discover lines of cars parked outside a movie theater. Expected within a city, yes, but the fact it is still standing with Alma waiting inside for you suggests that the developers wanted to simulate a sort of destructive relationship between the player and his fictional "girlfriend". Hell, there's even 14 levels in game, which mirrors her age.
Now obviously all of this sounds like fan fiction bullshit above, and it's ignoring this potentially fun mindfuck with the player that the game falls apart.
After trying so hard to use subtley and smart AI tricks in the first game, FEAR 2's guards run at you with like minded purpose. Your ability to slow down time is rendered moot, as plentiful armor and weapons exist around every corner. In all honesty, you can tell they wanted to go for a regenerating health system but were afraid of scaring away their former audience. Your comrades in arms all die expectedly and offer generic shits, fucks, and "what the hell is happening" for you to groan at.
But it's during these groans you notice another feature of the game, the prevalance of water. Everywhere you turn water is dripping out of pipes, onto your mask, etc. I'd like to pretent it's a silent reference to the fact that when Alma's water bursts the world will be left as ruinous as the cityscape you're currently exploring.
That'd probably be out of Bertha's realm however.
The core combat is fairly satisfying, but slow-mo just feels less fun this time around. The goons you rip through just feel muted compared to their chatty counterparts in the first game. While you've got the ability to create cover on demand, none of it ever proves too useful.
You'll probably also end up killing yourself while fiddling with your inventory more than actual gunfights will kill you.
Should you check it out? I guess, it's certainly a competent little game. Maybe if you've just arisen from a coma and never played an FPS since Doom it'd seem like the most psudeo realistic terror experience ever created. To anyone who has played Halo 3, play it again while running a copy of The Ring soundtrack in the background. Maybe have your girlfriend or a special lady friend sit next to you naked while doing so. It'd be the same experience.
Wait, goddamn it that sounds like a better time already.
What's really a disappointment is that the title of FEAR is never once scary. This is just so disappointing when I remember the terrifying department store fistfight in Condemned. Come now Monolith, you can do better.
Then I also remember this was the same company that had you fight a zombie bear in Condemned 2.
Goddamn Monolith.
For every excellent concept they develop, they somehow manage to screw up several other bad ideas in the process.
Two of their early titles, Blood and Shogo: Mobile Armor Division were excellent titles and solid concepts. The only drawback was that in both games most players wouldn't live long enough to see the actual game as your character was more frail than an anemic child.
Then came their problem with sequels... they are universally terrible in comparison to the first game 90% of the time. Ok, I'll grant you Aliens vs Predator 2 and maybe No One Lives Forever 2.
FEAR 2 breaks that curse... kind of. Perhaps a little bit of history is in order, both of myself and the game.
Back in 2004 I had first heard of Monolith's next titles, one for that new fangled Xbox 360 coming out the follow fall with the other being a PC only title through and through. I found out the console one was about beating up the homeless while the PC title would be a cross between the X-Files, John Woo, and Rainbow Six.
As any punk kid with a new Alienware would do, I bet on FEAR being the megahit.
So thus the waiting game began, but the game of life took greater precidence. Notably, I went off to college like adultescent boy my age and fell into the rut of excessive boozing and studying.
Put blunt, life was damn good.
Near the end of my first month, I remembered that both FEAR and Quake 4 were to be released and thus immediately picked up my copies.
Now, it's important to note that I purchased my copies at the Leominster Circuity City. At the time, it was the only electronics store within a 30 mile radius of my college outside of Gamestop. Though the prices would fluxuate wildly, I ended up making that store my third most visited location in the glorious Fitchburg/Leominster area, behind the liquor store and Tiki Tiki- the best Chinese takeout in Fitchburg fyi.
Eagerly rushing back to my dorm to install all 5 cds of FEAR, I came to a horrific realization within two hours.
It sucked.
It wasn't a straight up suck that just has the marks of a bad game written all over it, but it was a special kind of suck where every good idea an intention they may have had with the finished product resulted in a disaster.
In short, it was pretty analogus to the Leominster Circuit City.
Now, four years have passed and everything has been turned on its head since then. My PC continues to age and languish while I buy dongle after dongle for my 360, I found to my pleasure that Condemned's hobo murdering was game of the year material, and I've since been forced off campus due to my aforementioned lifestyle.
More importantly though, Circuit City will probably be nothing but an abandoned storefront by the time you read this.
Fitting then, that Monolith finally brings its A-Game to the table when I'm at a point in my life that it means so very little.
Anyways on to the game itself. FEAR 2 is a retooling of FEAR 1. Monolith discovered the hard way no one cares about PC games anymore, therefore the entire game is nothing but a retelling of the first game.
It's also in this retelling they loose a wondeful plot to the throes of stupid designs. Goddamned Bertha.
Watch out, I'm going to spoil the game for you and not care so stop here I guess if you want to play this and not have the ending ruined. In all honesty though, you can enjoy the game more if you know the disappointment that follows.
FEAR 2 ends with your protagonist being raped by the ghost of the 14 year old clone of the Ring girl.
Yes, that is the ending. It is as stupid and as contrived as one can get in a first person shooter. It resolves no plot, provides no closure, it just simply ends with your character feeling his seed in the belly of Alma.
Were the writers and designers of Monolith actually intelligent, it could have made for a great play upon the suburban nightmare of teen pregnancy. Moreover, they could have explored very real prejudices and "fears" within their target audience. After all, for the 15-25 year old male, nothing is more terrifying than the idea of unwittingly becoming a father.
Interestingly, and perhaps a sign of silent protest against Bertha, levels are designed around the concepts of areas in which teens meet and fuck. It's quiet ingenious in all honesty. Of course, there are the science labs, test areas, and all the other shlock that comes with the territory of a sci-fi shooter, but brief moments of insight shine through.
For instance, at one point in the game you're forced to explore a school. Simple, straight forward, and insipid once you realize it's an underground testing site!!!!!! (Those exclamations are to represent your shock you see)
Nevertheless, the crux of the spooky sequence in the level take place in the dimly lit broom closets of the school. Wearing nothing but her hair, Alma meanders the coridors always two steps ahead of you, seemly luring you to follow her. When you do eventually catch up to her, which occurs only at her discression, you're momentarily pinned up against a locker while she seems to smile while inspecting your body.
Later in the game, as you meander through the city streets shooting spacemen or the storm troopers or whatever they are, you discover lines of cars parked outside a movie theater. Expected within a city, yes, but the fact it is still standing with Alma waiting inside for you suggests that the developers wanted to simulate a sort of destructive relationship between the player and his fictional "girlfriend". Hell, there's even 14 levels in game, which mirrors her age.
Now obviously all of this sounds like fan fiction bullshit above, and it's ignoring this potentially fun mindfuck with the player that the game falls apart.
After trying so hard to use subtley and smart AI tricks in the first game, FEAR 2's guards run at you with like minded purpose. Your ability to slow down time is rendered moot, as plentiful armor and weapons exist around every corner. In all honesty, you can tell they wanted to go for a regenerating health system but were afraid of scaring away their former audience. Your comrades in arms all die expectedly and offer generic shits, fucks, and "what the hell is happening" for you to groan at.
But it's during these groans you notice another feature of the game, the prevalance of water. Everywhere you turn water is dripping out of pipes, onto your mask, etc. I'd like to pretent it's a silent reference to the fact that when Alma's water bursts the world will be left as ruinous as the cityscape you're currently exploring.
That'd probably be out of Bertha's realm however.
The core combat is fairly satisfying, but slow-mo just feels less fun this time around. The goons you rip through just feel muted compared to their chatty counterparts in the first game. While you've got the ability to create cover on demand, none of it ever proves too useful.
You'll probably also end up killing yourself while fiddling with your inventory more than actual gunfights will kill you.
Should you check it out? I guess, it's certainly a competent little game. Maybe if you've just arisen from a coma and never played an FPS since Doom it'd seem like the most psudeo realistic terror experience ever created. To anyone who has played Halo 3, play it again while running a copy of The Ring soundtrack in the background. Maybe have your girlfriend or a special lady friend sit next to you naked while doing so. It'd be the same experience.
Wait, goddamn it that sounds like a better time already.
What's really a disappointment is that the title of FEAR is never once scary. This is just so disappointing when I remember the terrifying department store fistfight in Condemned. Come now Monolith, you can do better.
Then I also remember this was the same company that had you fight a zombie bear in Condemned 2.
Goddamn Monolith.
2/27/09
Grand Theft Auto: Lost and Found Box
The Lost and Damned expansion for Grand Theft Auto 4 seems to be caught in a paradox of its own design.
On one hand, you're the well defined character of Jimmy the Jew out on his quest for personal redemption.
At the same time though, you're also you, the jerk holding the controller.
Let's be honest for a moment, if you're playing a GTA game you're probably a jerk in some capacity. You may be a very well intentioned jerk most of the time, but at the end of the day nothing gives you a half mast faster than the idea of hurting someone you barely know. This isn't projecting really, as we all experience that momentary catharsis when we imagine all the ways we could hurt the guy who cut us off in traffic, the lunch line, what have you. The key thing that makes us function members of society though is that we never act upon those impulses.
At least with Nico, we at least had the excuse of our protagonist being a hardened war vet merely passing through greatest country in the world u s of a, very nice.
Johnny, however, doesn't have that luxury. He just wants to deal his drugs in his motorcycle club, not necessarily shoot a lad- who was merely enjoying his morning jog- point blank with a shotgun then dart away by driving over his forehead.
But you do because you're a jerk.
Grand Theft Auto 4's Liberty City was a fascinating microcosm somehow compressed to a DVD. Assuming you merely played the game as a linear sequence of game "bites", which they call missions, or, heaven forbid, played it like any of the other Grand Theft Auto titles, you would have missed out on the majority of the game.
Complaints abound on the internet over this fact and, to a certain extent, I can see why. Games cannot be games unless there are a definitive set of goals to be accomplished. If numbers aren't going up or down, it means nothing is happening and, therefore, you aren't playing a game. The old Grand Theft Auto games lived by this rule.
Collect enough dope bags? Get a new gun.
Fly through enough rings? Get a plane.
Etc, Etc, Ad Nasuem.
In GTA4, you can do the aforementioned actions, but there's no real pressing reason to.
GTA4 has a full subway and train system you can use for transportation. It's even modeled right down to the smallest detail of the NYC system. Never once in the game is it required however.
You can pick up objects and carry them around in a semi-realistic fashion. Again, it's never required though.
What the city is wonderful for, however, is being a breeding ground for your inner jerk.
The moment you grab that cup of coffee, someone in the distance will call you a nancy. It's at that precise moment you realize that you can toss the scalding coffee at them.
The trains could help you to get around town quicker, but it's more entertaining to drive a tour bus you stole from Times Square onto the tracks and see how it disrupts the rails.
The game exists as a living, breathing world with only one problem: you.
You are that fly in the ointment of the game's well oiled world.
In GTA4, it was acceptable since your attitude was reflected in the actions of a character who'd do anything for money. The Lost (much like the direction of this essay hur) do not have this luxury.
While the overall quest Johnny undergoes in his personal tragedy to save the Lost from destroying itself from the inside out is commendable, it feels too personal. We, as jerks and players alike, are able to glimpse into his world but never fully grasp what makes Johnny tick.
Nico's dispassonate attitude towards life and prison he has created for himself is a decent enough background to unleash our inner ids. Johnny is too active a character though. As a motorcycle gang member, having him drive around in cars seems out of place. Same with walking for anything longer than a short jog, his movements seem stiff and disconnected from the world he's in. Heartlessly stabbing a co-ed walking back from the mall results in Johnny screaming about the current condition of his foreskin and what potential things the young lass should do to it.
In short, he's trying to hard to be bad for himself.
As players, we're left feeling rather apathetic towards Johnny's plight as most of his screw ups involve him doing things no motorcycle gang should be talking part in. Moreover, his cutscene addled pleas for his club president to stop with his madness seem hollow when we know that we're probably kill at least two dozen gang member and end another dozen more civilian lives in the ensuing "colateral damage" in each mission.
This isn't to say that the game itself is bad, merely that it feels like the script writers broke into the programmers office one quiet Sunday to rewrite the game to their standards.
Admittedly, the living world I sang of so highly before isn't necessarily the focus of Johnny's existence anyways. The clothing shops Nico visited for new duds are gone for instance. On the other hand, high powered guns and bikes are just a phonecall away.
Johnny, then, is a character who is forced to be a toy. Nico embraced his clockwork role with vigor, Johnny just can't seem to stick with the script. Who can blame him however? His world is one where stage direction and set design take a back seat to watching actors perform their own minimalist interpretation. Theatrical? Certainly. But here's the difference: this is a game.
Nico understood that we have no interest his reasons for being in America. He left his problems on the back burner to provide us a suitable second skin. Johnny, however, wants you to become him. Those are some massive leather boots to fill.
I guess then, Johnny is a character two steps removed from the game. Nico's controls and actions felt as natural to control as the nervous system impulses that make us tick. Johnny, on the other hand, seems to be sitting behind our couch while we're holding a controller while nagging us every step of the way.
On one hand, you're the well defined character of Jimmy the Jew out on his quest for personal redemption.
At the same time though, you're also you, the jerk holding the controller.
Let's be honest for a moment, if you're playing a GTA game you're probably a jerk in some capacity. You may be a very well intentioned jerk most of the time, but at the end of the day nothing gives you a half mast faster than the idea of hurting someone you barely know. This isn't projecting really, as we all experience that momentary catharsis when we imagine all the ways we could hurt the guy who cut us off in traffic, the lunch line, what have you. The key thing that makes us function members of society though is that we never act upon those impulses.
At least with Nico, we at least had the excuse of our protagonist being a hardened war vet merely passing through greatest country in the world u s of a, very nice.
Johnny, however, doesn't have that luxury. He just wants to deal his drugs in his motorcycle club, not necessarily shoot a lad- who was merely enjoying his morning jog- point blank with a shotgun then dart away by driving over his forehead.
But you do because you're a jerk.
Grand Theft Auto 4's Liberty City was a fascinating microcosm somehow compressed to a DVD. Assuming you merely played the game as a linear sequence of game "bites", which they call missions, or, heaven forbid, played it like any of the other Grand Theft Auto titles, you would have missed out on the majority of the game.
Complaints abound on the internet over this fact and, to a certain extent, I can see why. Games cannot be games unless there are a definitive set of goals to be accomplished. If numbers aren't going up or down, it means nothing is happening and, therefore, you aren't playing a game. The old Grand Theft Auto games lived by this rule.
Collect enough dope bags? Get a new gun.
Fly through enough rings? Get a plane.
Etc, Etc, Ad Nasuem.
In GTA4, you can do the aforementioned actions, but there's no real pressing reason to.
GTA4 has a full subway and train system you can use for transportation. It's even modeled right down to the smallest detail of the NYC system. Never once in the game is it required however.
You can pick up objects and carry them around in a semi-realistic fashion. Again, it's never required though.
What the city is wonderful for, however, is being a breeding ground for your inner jerk.
The moment you grab that cup of coffee, someone in the distance will call you a nancy. It's at that precise moment you realize that you can toss the scalding coffee at them.
The trains could help you to get around town quicker, but it's more entertaining to drive a tour bus you stole from Times Square onto the tracks and see how it disrupts the rails.
The game exists as a living, breathing world with only one problem: you.
You are that fly in the ointment of the game's well oiled world.
In GTA4, it was acceptable since your attitude was reflected in the actions of a character who'd do anything for money. The Lost (much like the direction of this essay hur) do not have this luxury.
While the overall quest Johnny undergoes in his personal tragedy to save the Lost from destroying itself from the inside out is commendable, it feels too personal. We, as jerks and players alike, are able to glimpse into his world but never fully grasp what makes Johnny tick.
Nico's dispassonate attitude towards life and prison he has created for himself is a decent enough background to unleash our inner ids. Johnny is too active a character though. As a motorcycle gang member, having him drive around in cars seems out of place. Same with walking for anything longer than a short jog, his movements seem stiff and disconnected from the world he's in. Heartlessly stabbing a co-ed walking back from the mall results in Johnny screaming about the current condition of his foreskin and what potential things the young lass should do to it.
In short, he's trying to hard to be bad for himself.
As players, we're left feeling rather apathetic towards Johnny's plight as most of his screw ups involve him doing things no motorcycle gang should be talking part in. Moreover, his cutscene addled pleas for his club president to stop with his madness seem hollow when we know that we're probably kill at least two dozen gang member and end another dozen more civilian lives in the ensuing "colateral damage" in each mission.
This isn't to say that the game itself is bad, merely that it feels like the script writers broke into the programmers office one quiet Sunday to rewrite the game to their standards.
Admittedly, the living world I sang of so highly before isn't necessarily the focus of Johnny's existence anyways. The clothing shops Nico visited for new duds are gone for instance. On the other hand, high powered guns and bikes are just a phonecall away.
Johnny, then, is a character who is forced to be a toy. Nico embraced his clockwork role with vigor, Johnny just can't seem to stick with the script. Who can blame him however? His world is one where stage direction and set design take a back seat to watching actors perform their own minimalist interpretation. Theatrical? Certainly. But here's the difference: this is a game.
Nico understood that we have no interest his reasons for being in America. He left his problems on the back burner to provide us a suitable second skin. Johnny, however, wants you to become him. Those are some massive leather boots to fill.
I guess then, Johnny is a character two steps removed from the game. Nico's controls and actions felt as natural to control as the nervous system impulses that make us tick. Johnny, on the other hand, seems to be sitting behind our couch while we're holding a controller while nagging us every step of the way.
Welcome to an internet website!
Hello, this is my blog on useless pop culture media.
By pop culture, I mean video games.
By video games I mean electronic toys designed for children yet consumed by adults.
Anyways, I tried this years ago and it never fully worked out. Hopefully the passage of time has honed my attention span to something longer than several minutes.
I honestly doubt that however.
By pop culture, I mean video games.
By video games I mean electronic toys designed for children yet consumed by adults.
Anyways, I tried this years ago and it never fully worked out. Hopefully the passage of time has honed my attention span to something longer than several minutes.
I honestly doubt that however.
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